Thursday, January 13, 2011

My mom made the decision for me

My mom made the decision for me.  This is a side story that is needed.  My parents had me make a hard decision about our family dog when I was in High School they asked me after our dog was poisoned if we should take her home and just nurse her in hopes that she would get healthy again or if we should just put her to sleep.  I made the decision to put our dog to sleep.  It was one of the hardest decisions I would ever make and I knew in my heart that one day I would be able to count on my parents when I needed to make a decision that I couldn’t handle. Well back on to the story.

 My mom made the decision for me.  My mom told me and whispered in my ear that I needed to be induced than she told the Dr.  So that is what I was going to do.  I started walking to the Labor and Delivery Room and while I was walking my ANGER was swelling up inside me.  We got to room number 5 (if you have ever seen the movie Where the Heart is the number 5 is a bad number for the main character) that is how I remember my room number.  My contractions were starting to turn into the beast inside of me.  I was so upset with having to feel the pain of a contraction and with the outcome of a dead baby.  No reward in the end.  They gave me morphine to reduce the pain while I waited for the epidural.  The person that administers the epidural was in a emergency C-section and couldn’t leave the room.  I wasn’t breathing when the contractions came.  I was so angry that I didn’t even care if I hyperventilated.  My husband sat at my side begging me to breathe.  I breathed for him.  The morphine only affected me in between contractions I would get rest and I would almost be asleep.

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